BlackDoor Ventures, Inc.

By HOWARD MANN

UPPER MARLBORO, Md – In her “Breaking the Marriage Code” workshop, First Lady Audree Ashe told a room full of men that there’s really no secret to success in matrimony. Husbands just have to remember one simple rule:“It’s all about her.”Attendees who chose that workshop at the 15tth annual Mighty Men of Valor National Men’s Conference might have been disappointed in the message, which comes from Ephesians 5:25. But Ashe pointed out how most men love the preceding verses, in which wives are instructed to submit and husbands are deemed the heads.“Husbands get caught up in the ‘submit’ part, but they don’t have anything to do with that,” she said. “That’s between your wife and God.”

Instead, Ashe said, husbands need to focus on loving their wives as Christ loved church; giving up their lives for their wives.

“It doesn’t matter where she is,” Ashe said. “She’s the church. And she deserves mercy and grace just like God has mercy and grace for His church. She deserves to be loved unconditionally the way God loves us unconditionally. A husband is supposed to have a role in his wife becoming a healthy Christian.

Ashe said you have to look at your wife like she’s your church. And husbands have to understand that she’s a joint heir to Christ, just like her husband.

“He who loves his own wife loves himself,” she said. “If you’re not loving your wife you’re not loving yourself. You are to love  your wife like your own body, and you don’t have the habit of smacking your own body verbally or physically.

“When you treat her the way Christ would,, she grows and develops rather than crashes,” she said. “She doesn’t become depressed. She blossoms and becomes responsive. But that’s not the case if you’re beating her down, demanding and controlling.”

Husbands are Christ in the marriage and wives are the church. And as Christ demonstrated, it’s all about His church. Which for husbands mean: it’s all about her.